(While I've shared a lot about my personal life with readers here on the blog, in some regards I've made a conscious effort to keep the focus more on fashion overall and less on my thoughts and experiences on the deeper whys of my journey in freestyle fashion. The thought behind that was to try to present this blog more as a fashion blog than as a political or social agenda. With that in mind, there are still some topics I feel I should probably cover here both to answer questions that readers may have and to further illuminate on the whys and wherefores of fashion freedom in general from my own perspective. If that type of thing is of interest to you, may I present the first in the new series "Behind the Seams"...)
Why do I wear dresses? Frankly, it's not a question that I often ask myself, or have made too much effort to answer. When I ask myself that question, my immediate response is, "Because I want to." and I'm often content to just leave it at that. Sometimes, though, particularly when I am bored, or if I read hateful comments made about my sartorial choices, I'll try to fill in the blanks a little further. Let's get into that.
The first reason that comes to mind is one of pure aesthetics. That is to say, that for as long as I can remember I have been absolutely enamored, enraptured, and dare I say it, enthralled with the look of the clothing made for women. On a purely visual level, I simply love dresses and high heels. When I see a dress or pair of shoes that I like, there's a feeling that I get in my chest that's impossible to explain, but I'm willing to bet that any fashionistas reading this will understand what I mean. This goes back as far as I can remember. I remember seeing all the pretty clothes that the girls at my school would get to wear for special events, while I was stuck wearing a pair of khakis and a polo shirt, which just seemed so incredibly drab and boring compared to the lovely styles, fabrics, and colors enjoyed by the opposite sex.
It's a thought I've never managed to shake, and to be honest, I don't want to. To sum it up as plainly as I can manage, there's just something so incredibly attractive to me about a beautiful outfit, completely separate from the attraction I may feel to the woman who is wearing it. Following that line of thinking, however, is where it starts to get curious.
The clothing that I wear, the outfits that I put together, are clothing that I find attractive. When I see a great outfit on myself I find myself thinking, "Yes, that's hot!" Then there's a realization that the outfit I'm wearing is an outfit that I would find attractive on a woman, and then it gets a bit muddy. When I get dressed, I don't really consider other people at all (well, that's not entirely true, I do consider Mrs. Spookshow, who, for example, has banned sequins), but rather dress to make myself feel good. I don't know why, but when I see a beautiful girl with a rockin' outfit, I'll want to wear that style. When I see a sharp dressed guy, I may appreciate the outfit, but I'll often find myself thinking, "Yeah, but that would look better with a skirt!" I've heard the saying tossed around that women often dress for other women (because let's be honest, chances are most men don't care or even notice that your belt coordinates so well with your shoes), and for whatever reason it seems that I'm just doing the same, ha!
The most common negative comment that I hear is that my clothing choice is (you guessed it) gay, because clearly, the only reason anyone would wear a skirt or pair of high heels is to please and attract a man. I don't believe for a second that most women truly factor that in when they get dressed every day ("Which of these prints is most likely to land me a boyfriend today?"), and to really believe so seems very sexist to me. Of course, we all know how much gay men are attracted to women, so surely me wearing a skirt is a clear signal that I'm interested in men.
Stepping beyond "Because I want to" the most simple answer becomes, "Because I like the way it looks." A part of me has just always loved the aesthetics of the clothing marketed towards women, and I want to wear the clothes that appeal to me. So, to those who take issue with the freedom of my sartorial choices, just remember, it's got nothing to do with you, it's all about me.
(That's the first reason I wear dresses. I'd love to know your thoughts, so leave me a comment below and let me know what you think. If you'd like me to elaborate on anything I wrote here, feel free to ask away. Reader interest will determine if I continue with this new series.)